I sit here and write this guide with the help of my significant other. We have been living together for a little over a month and feel we should share our experience with how our relationship has blossomed. It started on a OKCupid and even as anonymous as my profile was, she mysteriously found my Facebook profile and since then it’s been great. I cannot and will not complain about my situation as I feel I have been extremely lucky to find myself here.
First of all you’re going to need to be as comfortable with communicating as you can possibly be with the person you want to and with what ever medium that works most appropriately. Any instant messenger can do but it gives you space and time to think about the response before bombarding your significant other with even more hatred. Take a step back and behind separate devices and breathe. If this person is worth your time then you should be invested into not completely allowing yourself to decide exclusively on a right or wrong basis. Bonus points if you’re in the same room just nerding out.
When you’ve gotten comfortable with communicating by giving each other time and space, you begin to open to revealing more personal information building trust. The amount of space can vary quite a lot as time can be in minutes, hours, days, weeks, months to years if you’ve completely lost yourself in something that could have been nearly a decade ago but realize it could nor would happen ever again because too much time has passed. You can’t expect to have a successful relationship with someone you’re not comfortable or compatible with.
You cannot have a successful relationship that isn’t mutually beneficial either. Getting this out in the open is a maturing process that can be a quick pull of a band-aid or agonizing torture for the entire relationship. This should be done delicately as material discussion of the matter may be sensitive. This conversation may also seem humorous and pointless but it is an integral part of the relationship.
Once both have clear cut terms and conditions for the relationship they can be used as prenup agreements for marriage boundaries and releases. This isn’t to say that marriage is something that should be discussed 1 month in but we’re experimenting with our elevated hearts and minds above. This guide will be continued as our relationship yields its fruit being either a life journey, business venture or both.
As of 14 April 2018: I am no longer in a relationship.